Most professional writers would agree that "good" writing contains a variety of sentence constructions.  Look at these next two paragraphs and decide which is more appealing.

1. Juanita went to the store.  She bought kumquats and melons. She took her purchases home.  She placed them on the counter.  Her toucan flew out of its cage. It landed upon the melon. It started pecking at the kumquat. It made a loud squawk at the funny taste. It then flew into the living room before Juanita could scold it.   She figured the taste was enough punishment.

2. After purchasing kumquats and melons at the  store, Juanita took them home and placed them on the counter.  Her toucan flew from its cage, landed on the melon and preceded to peck at the kumquat. Before she could scold it, it gave a loud squawk and flew into the living room.  The unusual taste, she figured, was enough punishment.

If you are like most people, you had a difficult time reading #1.  If you go back and reread it, you will see that it is entirely made of a subject - verb - complete thought constructions. Boring.  The second makes use of many devices.  Read the suggestions below, then complete the sentence combining exercise.

Be Cautious of "Be" Verbs

"Be" verbs are am, are, was, were, is, being, have been, being.

Some people call them "taboo" words and try to get students to avoid them in everything they write. But don't give up your "be" verbs--know when you want them and use them.

Take a look at your "be" verbs. If you use a lot of them, you may be wordy. You may be loading your sentences with nouns (often in prepositional phrases), too. But then you may need those "be" verbs to say what you need to say.

1. Do "be" verbs replace stronger verbs?

bullet Melissa is the type who thinks she's right. [Melissa thinks he's right.]
bullet His facial expression was an indication that he was wrong. [His face convinced us that he was wrong.]
bullet It was an exaggeration. [Germaine exaggerated.]
bullet It was a commitment that they had shown. [They showed a commitment.]
bullet Noriko was in an aggressive frame of mind. [(maybe) Noriko aggressively attacked Akiko's opinions.]

2. Do "be" verbs delay your point?

bullet It was true that she was a late-bloomer. [See was a late-bloomer.]
bullet There was occasionally a hamster in the basement. [A hamster was occasionally in the basement.]
bullet It was difficult for him to go. [He couldn't find the time to go.]

Most writers would agree that using active verbs rather than be verb strengthens your writing.

Ways to Combine Sentences

Ways to combine sentences:

1. -ING Phrases - Present Participle Phrases

The man counted his change. The man smiled at the clerk.

bullet Carefully counting his change, the man smiled at the clerk.
bullet The man, carefully counting his change, smiled at the clerk.

2. -ED Phrases - Past Participle Phrases

The woman decided to celebrate the results. The woman was pleased.

bullet Pleased with the results, the woman decided to celebrate.
bullet The woman, pleased with the results, decided to celebrate.

3. Prepositional Phrases

We go over the river. We go through the woods.

bullet Over the river and through the woods we go.

4. Renaming Phrases - Appositives

My car is small. My car is a rusted. My car is a pile of junk.

bullet My car, a rusted pile of junk, is small.

5. Who and That Clauses  -- Relative Clauses with Essential Info

People live in glass houses. People should not throw stones.

bullet People who live in glass houses should not throw stones.

Things are made from metal.  Metal can rust.

bullet Things that can rust are made from metal.

6. Who and Which Clauses -- Relative Clauses with Non-essential Info

Mother is looking forward to Thanksgiving. Mother can cook a tasty turkey meal.

bullet Mother, who cooks a tasty turkey meal, is looking forward to Thanksgiving.

The new semester starts in January.  We are looking forward to the new semester.

bullet We are looking forward to next semester, which begins in January.

7. -Ing Substitution Clauses - Noun Clauses

If you talk out loud to yourself, people will wonder about you.

bullet Talking out loud to nobody makes people wonder about you.

8. That Substitution Clauses - Noun Clauses

He passed the course with an A.  I was not surprised that he passed the course.

bullet That he passed the course with an A did not surprise me.

9. How-what-when-where-why Substitution Clauses
Noun Clauses

He passed the course with an A. I wondered how he passed the course. I was surprised that he passed with an A.

bullet How he passed the course with an A surprised me.

Herre's an example of how this works:  Each set of sentences below has two or three short sentences. COMBINE each set of sentences into ONE complete sentence.

1. He bumped me. The coffee spilled. It burnt my arm. (use a preposition)

Rewrite: After bumping into me, he spilled his coffee which burnt my arm.

2. The dog ran away. A man found him. He returned the dog to us. (use a ING Phrases - Present Participle Phrases)

Rewrite: Our dog, having run away, was returned to use by the man who found him.

3. Jill left in a hurry. Jill left her money at home. Jill could not get into the show. (Renaming Phrases - Appositives)

Rewrite: Jill, who had left in a hurry, could not get into the show because she left her money at home.

4. The tire went flat. We had to change it. We were late. (Who and Which Clauses
Relative Clauses with Non-essential Info )

Rewrite: We had to change the tire that had gone flat which made us late.

Click here for your assignment.

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Last revised: November 19, 2009 by Jan Strever -- jstrever@scc.spokane.edu
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